Wednesday, May 23, 2007

I guess it's not really a sacrifice if it doesn't hurt....

I’m the only stay at home mom that I know of who has latch-key children.

Let me explain, last fall I took an extremely part-time job in a doctor’s office. My friend, “C” is the office manager and I thought it would be a novelty to work one or two days a month with her. I went in and trained for a couple of days and starting substituting for the regular receptionist on an as-needed basis. It was the perfect setup, I enjoyed my co-workers as well as working with the patients and the hours were flexible. I could work if I was available and leave if I needed to pick kids up from school etc.

Come February, Missions Emphasis Month rolled around at our church. I decided that I wanted to pledge my paychecks from the doctor’s office to missions for 2007. I ran it by my husband, who gave me the go ahead and I filled out the pledge card and turned it in. Now before you start thinking about what a devoted and faithful Christian I am, let me be honest with you- at the time, it really wasn’t a big deal… First of all, I don’t make that much at the doctor’s office. In addition, we live a fairly comfortable life. It’s not like money is growing on trees or anything, but I don’t have to worry that we’ll have enough money to pay the mortgage or feed our kids each month… So it was all going well- I worked an occasional day here and there with the added benefit of feeling good about my ‘sacrifice’ when I put in my mission offering.

Then it all began to change- the regular receptionist decided that a career change was in order and she resigned. My hours at work increased while they interviewed and trained a new employee. My house started to fall apart and the laundry piled up. Not wanting to let my friend “C” high and dry- I set up carpools for the kids, gave Teenage Daughter a house key and worked as many hours as I could- knowing all the while that the end was in sight… Suddenly my ‘sacrifice’ felt like a test. In spite of the inconvenience, I felt that I had made a pledge that I needed to fulfill and I continued working. It even felt good to know that I was being obedient (something that has never come naturally to me). New Employee starting working full time and I breathed a sigh of relief as my life began to return to its usual routine…

After only a few days of back to normal, I got the call asking if I could come back in to work. New Employee had lasted less than two weeks when she called in to say that it would be her last day. So here I am working again Monday though Thursday (Friday's are spent working as a parent aide at my kid's school). To be honest, it doesn’t feel good anymore- I’m exhausted, the house is trashed, and I need to go buy groceries! Suddenly, my ‘feel good mission offering’ has become an actual Sacrifice and I’m discovering that sacrifice is painful!

So if you think about me in the next couple of weeks, say a prayer… “C” is interviewing more potential employees today, my family has been more than patient at home, and I need a nap…

2 comments:

Llama Momma said...

This. Is. Hard.

Seriously.

(I've gotta break my Grey's Anatomy addiction!)

One gal on a journey. said...

C's husband says C is a homewrecker :)